by The Hard-Ons
It sounds ridiculous, but right now, the world needs a new Hard-ons album. That’s right, in this era of downloading, social-networking and over-the-top consumerism, the world needs, as outrageous as this sounds, the new album from three shirtless middle-aged men who still play like they are the only band on the planet.
Clocking in at just over 40 minutes and 19 songs, “Alfalfa males once summer is done conform or die” represents a concise and compact look at the legendary and powerful Hard-ons. With an epic and infamous disregard for popular trends and nice haircuts, the three quasi-virtuosos have unleashed their finest album. You may have noticed a disconcerting lack of irony, humour and originality in modern “punk” and “metal”. Look no further. The Hard-ons’ “Alfalfa males once summer is done conform or die” will leave footprints on top of your skull, yet leave you smiling!
To sum up, it is fair to say that “Alfalfa males once summer is done conform or die” is a series of compact musical explosions. It is a fascinatingly brilliant paradox of an album. Loose and tight. Brutal and beautiful. Violent and tender. Virtuosic and naïve….Typical Hard-ons…
“Alfalfa males...” is at once a face-peeling thrash-metal album, slash-and-burn punk album and a brilliantly catchy power-pop album. This is the apex of a rare beast: a band that for a quarter of a century laughed at the mainstream and deliberately shunned it; a band that gloriously does what it instinctively feels; paradoxically, a band that carefully and organically crafts its musical output with the utmost respect that it deserves.
Of course, it goes without saying, “Alfalfa males…” features the visually arresting graphics of bassist Ray Ahn. Psychedelic violence with humour, as per usual!
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